Saturday, December 31, 2011

Day 17: Gained .4 pounds! And guess what? No big deal

It really isn't.  During my previous JF I had several days when I gained weight, and many days when I platued.  My body is just adjusting and for some reason decided to maintain some of the 84 ounces of juice I drink daily.  The amount I consume is pretty darn close to a gallon of liquid, which weighs 8 pounds. I am just happy the scale didn't register more.

I have not alway been this rational about a weight gain, especially while dieting.  Normally, I'd take it as a sign that the diet isn't working. Especially if I'd been on it as long as say, 24 hours.  Even a 2 ounce gain would move me to tears. I would start sputtering on the unfairness of life, why is it that other people can eat whatever they want, and yada, yada, yada.

What happens when I am not on any sort of a weight loss program?  I'd often be thrilled with only a  2 ounce gain when I'd finally found the courage to step on the scale. Or even if it were a three or four pound gain, I'd be relieved it wasn't more. In fact, I would be so relieved, I wouldn't bother to do anything about the weight gain.  In fact, I'd usually celebrate by going out to eat.

Maybe I am just too old now to create drama around my weight issues.  Or maybe at this late age, I have finally grown up.  Whatever the reason, I am so glad I am not freaking out over a couple of crummy ounces.  They will be gone, soon enough.  And the last time I checked my mailbox Playboy hadn't written, asking me to pose.  Besides, tomorrow is not only a new day but a new year.  It doesn't get better than that.

Day 16:  Totally juicing/ .4 pound gain / 16.6 total loss

Quote for the day:  "Life isn't about finding yourself.  Life is about creating yourself."  George Bernard Shaw

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
Anne Frasier's Deadly Treats 
and more

Friday, December 30, 2011

Day 16: Lost .6 -Total Loss of 17 pounds so far

If you copy and paste the following link in your web browser - you will a photo and recipe of a dish I have been salivating over for two days ...
http://www.amateurgourmet.com/2008/11/the_best_brocco.html

Yep, that's what juice fasting  reduces  you to...a craving for roasted broccoli and baked sweet potato fries.  I am noticing that, unlike the last fast, I am searching the web for healthy recipes.  When I do allow myself to think about food, I think how nice it would be to have a steaming bowl of squash soup. Or a salad of spinach topped with fresh strawberries.  When my  latest order from Amazon arrived today - a Wilton Nonstick 6-cavity Donut pan for baking donuts, not frying them - I  squealed in delight when the UPS driver handed the package to me.  And tonight, after finishing the blog, I will start to collect recipes for making sugar-free, fat-free, baked donuts.  Sure, they won't taste like the real thing, but they'll look like the real thing.  And sometimes that's good enough.

For instance, I'd love to have a big diamond ring, but I'd lose it.  I lose everything (except weight for most of my life). There's not a day that goes by that I don't spend at least a half-hour looking for something.  If I ever write a memoir, it will be titled "A Life Spent Looking for Car Keys", not very catchy but totally accurate.  So instead of a massive diamond, I have an even bigger zirconia  When I look at it, it makes me smile. I feel like the poor man's Elizabeth Taylor. But more important, I don't have to worry about it.  I am sure I will have the same reaction to the baked donut.  It may not be the real thing, but I won't have to worry about eating it.

And for a compulsive overeater - stress free eating  is better than anything fried.

Day 15:  Still managing to juice fast but hanging on by a poorly painted fingernail:  17 pounds lost.

Quote for the day:  "We are constantly invited to be what we are..." Henry David Thoreau

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Day 15: down another .4 Way to go me!

The scale came though for me today.  It showed a loss, releasing me from yesterday's plateau.  Of course, I have no idea what it will not say tomorrow.  But one thing I know, it will not say the same as when I started this second juice fast.  Not even I could gain 16.4 pounds overnight.

A close friend tried to offer me a friendly suggestion today about my fast.   He suggested it wouldn't harm me if I had only one meal for New Year's Eve and immediately go back on the fast.   Poor guy.  For the next twenty minutes he had to listen to my diatribe on how I can't break this fast, even for one second.  Not a grape, nor a raisin, nor a shred of lettuce will cross my lips.  Why?  Because I have done that all of my life.  I am notorious for drifting off course,  ending up worlds away from my original destination.  In fact, I am convinced the diet industry teaches us it's okay to "break your diet" every once in while, just to keep us caught hopelessly in a cycle of gaining and dieting.

Maybe some people could have a meal and immediately begin to juice again.  Not me.  More than likely, this is what would happen.  I'd have the meal.  Then I would ask the waiter to give me a box to take the small portion I hadn't scarfed down home.  At home, I  would say, "Well, this probably doesn't freeze well".  The next thought would be, "You know a piece of buttered bread would go really good with this."  Followed by, "Well, I could consider the entire evening one continuous meal.  Maybe I could add a little..." etc., etc., etc.

It's far easier to give up a New Year's Eve dinner then it would be to start the fast over again.  I'd love to celebrate the holiday at a fancy restaurant.  But instead, I will be sitting in my basement family room, watching DVDs with my husband, knowing I am taking care of myself.  Which actually isn't a bad way to start the New Year.

But next New Year's Eve? The sky's the limit. And that sky will probably be in Las Vegas.


Day 14: Still Juicing/16.4 pounds lost

Quote for the day:  "If  you want to feel rich, just count all the gifts you have that money can't buy."

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Day 14: Zero weight loss today! Stalls Happen!

Okay, it was bound to happen -  a day when the scale didn't show me how wonderful I was becoming.  Instead, Mrs. Feeley told me that my body needed to take a breather from the stress of losing weight. (Yes, I named my scale.  Why? Because it's harder to hate someone or something that you've personalized.  Mrs. Feeley was my favorite grade school teacher.  She once told me I had beautiful brown cow eyes, right before sending me out to stand in the hallway for talking too much in class.)

And because Mrs. Feeley is a digital scale, I didn't jump up and down on it in disgust.  I didn't hold it in the air and shake it. I just accepted it as "No big deal".  I am still going to continue juice fasting for two more weeks and two days.  I am still going to be positive.  And just like in school, I will forget what Mrs. Feeley said in a matter of minutes.  I use to be intimidated by the scale and getting on it could depress me for an entire day. But now that I've named it,  it doesn't bother me as much.  It's become a person to me.  And a person can disappoint, help, love or encourage you.  But in the end, it is how you keep your end of the bargain with that person that counts.  Right now I am fasting to lose weight.  Eventually, Mrs. Feeley will have to agree.

But if this stall lasts too long, I just may set an apple on top of her.  Just in case.

Day 14: Still Juicing/16 pounds lost


Quote for the day:  "What if The Hokey Pokey Is All It Really is About?" Jimmy Buffet

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Day 13: Down .4 but sick of only having juice

Actually, I think I am just simply tired.  Two nights with little sleep leaves me wanting nothing more than a trip to the French bakery.  Or brewing a thick cup of espresso (I am also off caffeine for the duration of the juice fast.)  Before I started fasting I would often eat for energy when I was hungry.   When exhausted, I would drift towards potato chips or french fries.  I craved salt constantly.  Even when I had it all day long. That alone could explain the quick weight loss in my first few days of having only juice made only from fresh fruits and juice. 

I am sure, when I wake up in the morning, I will feel more alive and positive. We all have these bad days. But for now, I am going to spend the evening moping and whining. Not as exciting as wining and dining, but a whole lot less calories.

Day 13:  living on juices/16 pounds lost

Quote for the day:  "You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one."

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more



Monday, December 26, 2011

Day 12: Lost .6 and The War of Samples

Yep, I had to go to Costco again and it was me against an array of delectables that would have made Kate Moss decide to become a Plus Size model.  But, instead of gobbling any down, I took notes. What did I walk away from? Tortilla crusted tilapia, grilled zucchini souffle, honey BBQ chicken wings, spinach artichoke Parmesan dip with bread, Jack Daniels pulled chicken on a bun, organic creamy tomato basil soup, butternut squash ravioli, Cheddar potato soup, quinoa & rice, Chex Mix, Caramel Wafers, Kashi bars, oats and honey granola bar.

Before my fast, I would shop at Costco perhaps twice a month.  Now with juicing, I have to make the trek every few days.  But it's not only samples I have to battle.  I adore their $1.59 polish sausage and all-you-can-drink beverage deal.  Where can you get lunch for that price?  Or a meal-size snack?  Or a snack between meal-sized snacks? The polish sausage is also wonderfully steamy and extra large. I'd measure it for you, but I have enough of a reputation now at Costco without adding to it.

Briefly, I thought of purchasing every item to have when my 30 days ended.  But,  I'm not allowing myself to fantasize about any cuisine - good or bad - that I will have once I am back on solid foods.  I think that's what got me into trouble after my last fast.  I kept telling myself, "You can have that when you're through juicing."  And, I did.  Many times over.  This time I will not fantasize about food, just like I won't fantasize about Daniel Craig.  Okay, maybe I will fantasize about Craig.  But an addiction to food is bad for me.  An addiction to Daniel Craig gets my heart racing. Consider it aerobics. I do.

Day 12:  Juicing like a mad woman/15.6 pounds lost

Quote for the day:  "I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure.  I make mistakes, I am out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." Marilyn Monroe

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Day 11: Another Pound Loss - Thanks Santa

Or whoever, or whatever is helping me to be focused and committed to this 30 day juice fast.

Normally, today would have been a day to stuff myself with a myriad of excuses and food.  But instead we watched a few movies ("Friends With Benefits" and "A Christmas Movie").  I called some very good friends. We skyped our brother-in-law in England.  I was finally able to see his lovely wife and daughters.  I tinkered around in my office. I listened to my audio book. And, I didn't gain any weight.  In fact, I probably lost a bit.

I couldn't think of a better present that I could have given myself than a holiday where I wasn't feeling guilty because I overate.  If I were a normal weight and not severely obese, trust me, I wouldn't feel any shame in overeating at Christmas.  But being this much overweight and doing that to my self, it's like shooting my self with a sugar bullet.

But, I did well today. And I am feeling good.

I hope your holiday was as good as mine.

DAY 11 :  Yep, still juicing /Weight Loss 15 pounds

Quote for the day:    "You have no cause for today for anything but gratitude and joy." - Buddha, via my friend and creative coach Kim Hines

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Day 1O - Weight Loss 14 pounds

I haven't posted my stats before because frankly, I need the math brain of my friend Sarah Weiss to figure it out.  The reason?  My first fast ended in September with a weight loss of 40.5 pounds.  Then part of the weight came back. A big part.  17 pounds.  Poor excuses for why are in my previous posts.  But now that I am close to weighing what I weighed in September, I am comfortable with posting my stats.  I have three more pounds to go before I am "even".  After that, I will consider any weight loss to be a blessing. (If you haven't read my post before, you might be interested in my first blog.  It is an explanation of my first 60 day juice fast. )

Doing another fast has been daunting. I certainly didn't want to do it. But now that I am, the results are so astonishing (much better than my first fast) that I'm glad I did.  I still don't know how I am able to do this.  To be able to stay away from food, to learn to just say "no".  But I do know that I am addicted to food.  If food made someone intoxicated like alcohol does, most days I'd be lying in the gutter in front of Dunkin' Donuts.

Have a great holiday.  Remember, your body's more important than that piece of fruitcake.

DAY 10 :  Still Juicing/Weight Loss 14 pound

Quote for the day:    "Holding a grudge is letting someone live rent-free in your head."
Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

And always remember check with your doctor before going on any diet!

Friday, December 23, 2011

Day 9: Why I like to juice fast.

I like to juice fast because the weight comes off quickly. I would swear on a stack of bibles that for the last decade I have not be able to lose any substantial amount of weight on any diet program.  From Weight Watchers to Atkins.  I would lose a few pounds and then stall for days, or weeks, with hardly a pound gone to show for it.  So when I started to juice fast, after watching Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead, I had little hope.  But, like I've written I vowed to stick with it no matter what for 60 days.  The results were amazing, just like they are now. Tomorrow I will post my stats, and then start posting them on a daily basis.  But tonight I just want to write about how grateful I am to have discovered this program.

On Dr. Oz's show yesterday he said that research has shown that losing weight really quickly has now been proven to be healthier for the obese patient.  I would agree.  The emotional high I get from losing weight this quickly, is just phenomenal.  The emotional lows I would get from looking at a scale, week after week with no results was devastating.  I always felt so much heavier  - with burden - every time I got off the scale.  Plus, I know I can stick to this for 30 days.  I don't know if I could do WW or Atkins for 4 months straight - which is the time it would take me to lose the same amount of weight that I do on this in a month.

On my 60 day fast I did stall and it was frustrating.  Sometimes 3 or even four days would go by before I lost weight.  Then I would drop 2 or 3 pounds overnight.  This time it has been a great first ten days, better than even my last fast when I was much heaver.

So, all in all, I am feeling very hopeful and happy.  Hope you are as well.

DAY :  Still Juicing/ Feeling very energetic.

Quote for the day:  "We must be willing to let go of the life have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

And always remember check with your doctor before going on any diet!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Day 8: Short Post/Long Day

Don't feel much like blogging or trying to be clever.  Living on juice is going fine. I am feeling well and very grateful I decided to do this again. But it is the holiday soon and I have things to do.

I remember when I did my first fast.  I made up a list of excuses that I might use to  the fast. I had everything on it from a tornado to my spouse dying to me dying.  (Yep, I put my own death on the no excuse  list. If I died, I wouldn't have been able to visit the all-you-can eat buffet in heaven, which of course I assume heaven is.)  I titled the list No Excuses, Not Even These.  Then every time one of them popped into my head, I'd think of the list.  I still have the list.  But now I have to add Christmas to it.  Still, the end results will be worth it.  No pain, no gain.  Or should I say loss?

Quote for the day:  "Be the type of person you want to meet."

Day 8:  Still juicing/feeling more energetic

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Stand-Up and Die
Who Died in Here?
Hotdish Haiku

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Day 7: My Favorite Juice and resisting samples at Sam's Club

Free food is always tempting to me.  Yep, I am one of those pathetic folks who line up in front of the sample ladies at Costco and Sam's Club. (I have a membership for both. Probably just to enjoy the freebies.)  Today  at Sam's Club, the samples were  sumptuous slices of two different cakes.  One was a decadent chocolate spoon cake and the other a double layer carrot cake.  And the slices were huge, not your ordinary small slice.  These were a normal sized slice.  It was late in the afternoon. The sample ladies obviously wanted to clear out their stock.  They were letting people take one of each.

It was as if I won the Fat Girl Lottery.  Two pieces of cake?  Both of them free?  I stood there watching the other customers grabbed up the goodies.  If I hadn't started this #$%%^& fast, I would have as well. But then, that is why I am on this fast.  I still look at every bit of food as if it were the last morsel on the planet.  I was tempted only briefly to scoop up the deserts. After that I had to fight the brilliant idea of taking them home to freeze in my freezer for a later date.  (Trust me, they would have been off my front seat and into my mouth by the time I drove out of the parking lot.)  But, I reminded myself there will always be cake.  Always.  But I will not always be here.  And as long as I am here - on this planet - I'd like to learn to be able to take care of myself better. That includes eating healthy.

So I came home and made my favorite juice, tomatoes and celery juice with a dash of hot sauce.  A spicy treat that I make only on special days when I need a pick up. It worked.  I have no plans to drive back to Sam's.

DAY 7:  Still Juicing/ Feeling Great

Quote for the day:  "Never judge a book by its movie." J. W. Eagan

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Stand Up and Die
Who Died in Here?
Hotdish Haiku

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Day 6: Food Porn

Food is interesting, isn't it?  It has texture, taste, and memories.  Plus, it can be visually stunning.  I could look at the color of food for hours on the internet. And now that I am juicing, and  bored silly, I do just that. I surf for Food Porn. I find picture after picture of glorious veggies and fruit.  I am as addicted to seeing images of  luscious deserts and steaming entrees as Charlie Sheen is to XXX anything.

Even when I am not juicing, I usually visit a few food sites weekly.  But now that I am, it's the first thing I click on in the morning,  I am not hungry.  But I do miss the crunch of food and the smell.  The hall I entertained in last night was cooking barbecue beef in the kitchen.  I could smell it the minute I walked through the door.  When I walked by someone crunching on a celery stick from a Bloody Mary, I wanted to yank it out of their hands.

Now that I have decided I am definitely only doing a 30 day fast this time around, I keep reminding my self that I am only giving up 90 meals.  Not much to give up when you consider what I will get in return.  Not much when I realize I've already had 68,437 meals (minimum) in my lifetime.

So when I feel the need to crunch,  I will chew on ice. And if  I must inhale an aroma, I will burn more incense than I did in the sixties. But unlike the 60s, at least I won't have the "munchies".  Darn.

Day 6:  Still Juicing/Feeling a bit more energetic

Quote for the day:  "Reading gives us a place to go when we have to stay where we are."

Monday, December 19, 2011

Day 5: Still Lazy After All These Years

I have to work tonight by entertaining at a Lion's Club in small town Minnesota.  It's a good job, actually, but it will keep me up late.  I worry about posting early, because the day isn't over.  I've already turned down my client's kind offer of food when I arrive.  I usually pig out after a show, the stress of performing still haunts me.  Or if I "bomb" I pig out even more.  There's nary a mini-mart in the midwest that doesn't have my face on their security cams.

I eat when I'm stressed, when I'm happy, when I'm sad. I guess I am saying I eat.  That's why this juicing is so much easier.  It allows me  few options.  Every morning I make a 20 ounce glass of fruit juice - grapefruit, oranges, pineapple and mangoes all go in the mix.  It is wonderful.  Then around ten a.m. I make 64 ounces of green juice - kale, spinach, carrots, ginger, green apples, celery and whatever is lying around.  I drink that for the rest of the day and night, sipping it through a straw. I find that limiting my choices in the number of times I juice a day works for me. I don't like to work a lot, and the process of juicing is  time consuming.

But then, I'm not very good with too many choices in any area of my life.  I am not only ADD but dyslexic. An okay combination for a comic but a continual obstacle for the author in me.  Or should I say em.

I have discovered that I am only ten pounds more than when I ended my first 60 day fast.  I should loose that ten easily by New Year's Eve, if  I stay with juicing.  I have never been on a diet that lets me loose pounds as quickly as juicing does.  Plus, I didn't gain the weight back immediately.  I stayed the same for the first three weeks. It wasn't until I started eating too much that the weight piled back on.

Why is it so hard for me, and for most overweight people, to understand that weight gain is about the food?  It's not about our moms, it's not about the guy who dumped us, it's not about about the people at work. It's about calories and probably about ingesting low glycemic foods. That's it.

So send me good vibes please, that I "break a leg"  at my show.  I may not be playing Vegas, but thank God I'm working.

Day 5:  Still juicing, feeling a bit more energetic.

Quote for the day is one I created: "Loose the blame to loose the weight." by Pat Dennis   :)

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Day 4: Still Juicing and dreaming about candy bars,

I have a special affection for candy bars.  Not only do they taste good but they remind me of my dad. My dad and I were never close. Men in the 50s didn't take on that role.  And my dad had a few personal demons of his own to battle, just like I do. But I know he loved me.  Every night, while working at the factory, my father would buy me a candy bar from the vending machine.  We were a poor family yet he managed to come up with the quarter to do so. He'd spend part of his break picking out the candy bar.  It was usually a Chuckles.  Every morning, when I'd awake I'd get to  check his lunch box for my treat. Or sometimes, late at night after I knew he'd fallen asleep, I'd sneak into our kitchen to find my gift.

My father did that act completely out of kindness and love.  I am the one who has mutated a candy bar into something other than it's original intention.  Now when I see one, my mind drifts off into ruminations of diets, counting calories, and guilt. I remember the days when I ate 4 or 5 candy bars.  I remember the shame of realizing I was overweight and then the 2 or 3 decades of denial.

What I'd like to get back to -- when I see a Chuckle or a Snickers or whatever - - is to be reminded how much my  father loved me.  The only way I can do that, is by clearing my mind and trying to accept myself.  Loving myself seems almost too much to hope for.  But loving others is something I can do.I can't seem to help myself, but that's no excuse for not helping you.

I started this fast on December 15th, my father's birthday.  I should have had a candy bar the night before in tribute.

Day # 4:  Going well, bored as hell. Food is my HBO.

Quote for the day stolen off the internet:  "I love you with all my butt, I would say heart, but my butt is bigger."

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Day Three: Shopping While Not Eating

It is the last Saturday before Christmas, not a good time to either be shopping or avoid food.  This afternoon I went to Costco, fortunately the food sample people had mostly gone home.  I love the samples at Costco. I can usually manage a good 300 extra calories  before I leave.  But today there was only one sample table left when we arrived. I asked my husband to be my food proxy.  Normally he doesn't bother with give-aways being the thin person that he is.  But he ate the sample of chocolate, cinnamon and almond goodness. When I asked how it was, he said it was too sweet.  If I could have filed for divorce at that very moment, I would have.

But it was nice having a food proxy to eat what I couldn't. I've often wished I could afford to hire someone else to live my life, to deal with my family, to write my novel and stories, to exercise 5 hours a day for me. I would sit on a cloud somewhere up above, and see if they fail as miserably as I often do. Or they might even succeed once in a great while.  Now that I am juicing only, I could order my minion to eat that slice of cake that keeps floating through my head, or chow down a bowl of Pad Thai.  I wouldn't even ask how anything tasted.  It would be heaven just knowing the virtual me was being satisfied.

I am never actually hungry while juicing.  Never.  But, the habit of eating gnaws at me. The boredom of not eating bothers me. The unfairness of having to do another fast makes me cringe.  (Though I doubt if it is unfair.  Fat  people, like me, tend to think everyone else can eat as much as they want and never gain weight. So, not true.)

I find juice fasting to be a mental challenge, not a physical one.


Quote for the day by R. Collier. "Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out."

Friday, December 16, 2011

Day Two: Really? I Posted What On The Web?

As I sit here, with my caffeine withdrawal headache, feeling totally exhausted due in part to a lack of sleep, I begin to wonder if I should have posted that I am doing a second 60 day juice fast.  What about a 30 day fast?  Wouldn't that be impressive?  Or a ten day fast?  I mean I already paid my dues with the first one, right?

Actually I have no idea how long I can keep this up again.  All I know is that I had to stop what I was doing -- eating uncontrollably. Example: I bought 18 large cookies to take to a potluck, and I ate 4 of them on the way. And I am talking the extra large, saucer size. Of course, I also ate at the potluck.

It's been that way -on and off - since I finished my 60 day juice fast almost three months ago.  The first week post fast, I was fine. I kept the food intake to a decent amount, focused on veggies, fruit, and healthy protein. Everything Joe Cross, the author of Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead, said to do.

The second week I had a house guest that I prepared meals for, tasty ones I knew she'd enjoy.  I slipped a little. A few days after she left, I became very ill.  Barely able to move, I drove to the doctor alone. A chest x-ray showed that I had pneumonia - - a serious condition for someone who has congestive heart failure.  I hung around just long enough to receive my prescription and then -- though I was very ill -- headed to the nearest Perkins for a stack of pancakes and strips of crisp bacon.  It's been that way ever since.

But now, two days into the second fast, I finally feel like I can breathe again. My overeating and subsequent weight gain was incredibly stressful for me. The only way I knew to stop my addiction was to step back from food, totally.  But being free of your drug of choice does have its own issues. In O.A. they teach you, "If you want to see why you're eating, then stop eating."

Now that I have stopped using pastries and potato chips, to block the constant torment of my personal demons and gremlins, the next few days should be a challenge.

But then, aren't they all?

Quote for the day:  "Let your faith be bigger than your fear."

Pat Dennis
Author
Hotdish To Die For
Hotdish Haiku
Who Died In Here?
Stand-Up and Die
and more

Thursday, December 15, 2011

A Second Sixty Day Juice Fast? Am I nuts?

Nope, just determined - and embarrassed, desperate, depressed, scared, etc.  Following is a copy of an email sent out after my original 60 day juice fast which ended September 8th, 2011.  I had triumphantly lost 40.5 pounds.  Only a few of my friends knew that I was juicing and avoiding all solid foods.  There was no way I was going to announce to the world that I was on yet another diet -- and keeping quiet worked. I lost the weight -- with another 60 to go --and I assumed wrongly that I would never gain an ounce of it back.  I have.  A significant amount of it back, in fact. I'm not willing to say how much right now - but I will within the next few days.  Basically, I don't want to get on the scale.

But this time around, I decided to share the process with whoever might stumble upon this post.  I obviously did not learn what I needed to learn the first time around.  For weeks I have had daily binges of 1,000 calories or more, consuming basically junk.  Kind of sad really, and even more pathetic when you read the following post proclaiming how good I felt eating real food.  But losing weight is similar to writing a novel  I have to keep plodding along, doing the right tuff daily, know there will be days when anything I try will fail, and I just have to wait until the next day to try again.

This time around I have decided I would not only share what I am doing on a daily basis but ask you for your good vibes for this old hippie.  Today is Day One:

The email I sent to my friends on Sept. 9th, 2011



SIXTY DAY JUICE FAST/40.5 POUNDS LIGHTER

A few you know that on July 9th I downloaded a documentary from Netflix called Fat, Sick, Nearly Dead. The story tells the true tale of Aussie Joe Cross who weighed 310 pounds and suffered from a horrendous autoimmune skin disease. He decided to come to America to live on juice only for 60 days as he hits the road with a juicer. He travels across the country interviewing strangers. True, by the end of his fast, Joe turns into a hunk but I was more touched by Phil. I identified with Phil, the physically ill, morbidly obese and morbidly depressed 410-pound Iowa trucker who had totally given up on ever being able to change. Except for the weight amount, that pretty much described me. Phil fortunately decided to follow the fast. The two men’s results were so spectacular that I insisted my husband watch it the next evening. He loved the film. On Monday July 11th I started the fast. As of today, Sept. 9th I have lost forty and a half pounds. This is my 61st day and I am now adding solid food back into my life.

But losing weight hasn’t been the only benefit. Within 3 days I had more energy than I have had since my early forties. I still feel the same way today. Except for one occurrence, I no longer have scary symptoms of my heart condition. They were becoming a daily event. My thinking has become clearer and I have worked more in these last 60 days than I worked in the past twelve months. One day I noticed I worked (wrote, cleaned the house, threw out files, studied software, did business crap) from 8 am until 11 pm. And I woke up happy, something I haven’t done since I was 24 years of age. My friends tell me my skin glows and my hair looks thicker.

The documentary talks a lot about processed foods (evil) and the benefits of a diet that is 80 percent fruits and veggies. The book following the diet/lifestyle can cure depression, type 2 diabetes, heart conditions, obesity, skin issues, well the list goes on and on. It’s all based on Dr. Joel Fuhmann’s book Eat to Live. It also claims that if you eat this way, you will meet all your nutritional needs and won’t be tempter to overeat. I doubted that greatly. Even appetite suppressants didn’t work with me. Daughter of a gun, this worked. (BTW, since I am a cynic by nature I thought these claims were was a load of crap. Now that I have experienced detoxing, no appetite and other healing processes, I think it is completely true. No more processed foods for me.)

I have coerced friends into watching the documentary—either for health or weight issues I knew they were battling. They all thought it was a wonderfully entertaining and informative documentary, too. All of them are juicing now and finding similar results, even if they not just juice fasting like I did.

Fat, Sick, Nearly Dead is funny, insightful and in my case, turned my life around.

Except for this last week—when all I wanted to do was break my fast so that I wouldn’t be successful at something—this has been the easiest diet I have ever been on. I was never once hungry, except for the first two days of the fast. Nor did I even want food. I often forgot to drink my juice and had to remind myself.

Not a shred of solid food has crossed my lips for sixty days until today. Not even the tiniest piece of lettuce. I decided early on if I were going to do it I would not listen to the ridiculous self-talk I entertain myself with for hours. Examples; “You deserve a treat”, “Everyone cheats”, “What’s the big deal? It’s only a piece of lettuce”, “I’m a big girl” “I carry my weight well”, “This is not going to work.”, “I only like things that taste good”, “Nothing works for me. Everything works for everyone else maybe, but not me. I am special. Really, it won’t work”, and the infamous “I just don’t want to do it. What’s the point? I will just gain it all back.”

No, I won’t gain it back. Pretty much I will be following Furhman’s life style forever. Mostly veggies, fruits, 2 ounces of nuts max daily, legumes, occasional whole grains and meat or fish 3 times a week. I will have a veggie juice every day (not V-8 or any processed juice. I do have at least 50 more pounds to lose, maybe even sixty. (Steve and I stopped having dairy in our house over a year and a half ago. So dairy isn’t even an issue for me. It is not allowed on Furhman’s plan.)

So, I wanted to let you all know what I have been doing. I am completely in shock that I actually did it. I am amazed at how great I feel. For those who knew about my juice fast, thank you for your support. You have no idea how much it meant to me and how much that support helped to keep me it focused. I didn’t want to disappoint anyone who believed in me. I have too much of a history of doing that to repeat it again. I told very few people what I was doing. Only the ones I had to, like the person I was spending the day with or if they were dealing with the same issues I am.

But, I was really surprised at the mind games that went on constantly in my head. My-oh- my, I can talk myself out of anything. This time I talked myself into something wonderful. (And yes, I am putting together a book and will continue writing it until I get to my weight goal.)

Fat, Sick, Nearly Dead is also available on Amazon either as a download or the DVD, and there is a book version. Joe Cross also has a great website which will redirect you, if needed, to his free program called Reboot. Just google the name of the book. (Did I mention he is also a wealthy Australian, besides being a hunk now? Sigh.)

Hope your day will be as good as mine will be.

(Feel free to pass this on, if you want.)